Tuesday, January 27, 2009

On the subject of blame

You know, I started to put this on my meditation blog and then I decided that it really belongs over here with politics:

When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce.

Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument.

That is my experience.

No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding.

If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change.

-- Thich Nhat Hanh

In the realm of politics, we blame poor people for being poor, desperate people for being deperate, and people who resort to violence (when they truly have no other recourse) for that too.

I think the "lettuce in the garden" is a wonderful metaphor. Next time I find myself getting upset with someone I'm going to remind myself, "Don't blame the lettuce!"


  1. To any friends of Ellie's reading this:

    Ellie was rushed to hospital an hour ago with heart attack symptoms. She has asked for everybody's prayers.

  2. Just saw MP's post Ellie. Hope all is well. Roger

  3. just saw MP's post. concerned and keeping you in prayers.

  4. Ellie, yes, prayers ascending. Hang on. We love you.

  5. Ellie, I'm keeping you in my prayers. I hope everything turns out well.

  6. Glad you're doing well. Roger


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